How to Survive When You're Sacked #PersonalStory

When my friend got sacked from his job, he approached me and we talked about it. While telling his "not-so-interested-story," I really had to show that I care, listening to him means a favor returned. His first sentence was:

"Getting the sack is far from being the end of the world." I felt guilty because I thought that he wanted to "throw the world" at me. But instead, continue reading.

Even if you don’t like your job very much, the last thing you want is to be sacked from it. Having the control over your destiny snatched away, finding yourself suddenly without an income, with no structure to the day and no friends in familiar surroundings, having to explain to future employers and the rest of the world why you weren’t wanted. It hurts and it’s messy.

The degree of hurt depends very much on your own resources and what you’ve got tied up in the job; someone whose sense of status is dependent on their position is going to take being sacked much harder than someone who derives their sense of worth from other, entirely separate things. And the person with a life-style (and debts) to go with the position is going to be more adversely affected than someone more flexible. But, however able you are to cope with the eventual outcome the moment the axe actually falls, even if you have been expecting it – always comes as a shock.

Even when in your heart of hearts you know it’s coming, you kid yourself for a while and think you must be paranoid. Even though, as I found out later, everyone knew when it finally happened it came like a bolt out of the blue. It was awful. I thought I was going in for a meeting to discuss some routine business and a few moments later I realized that business was me. It’s horrific to have to go through that.

Despite the shock I felt upset but somehow my instinct for self-preservation took over. I did felt damaged inside, but I used that time to work out what I wanted and managed to pull myself together. I went icy calm. I asked for an explanation, put my own case forward and maintained dignity throughout, which was good, it helped me think clearly. I said I should be paid off because I’d done valuable work. I knew work wasn’t the problem. This was politics. My new boss wanted his person in my place. I showed spirit and a sense of fairness, but I wanted compensation for what I’d been through.

I got the money right then – a very substantial amount. My superior just wrote a cheque. That sweetened things; it makes you realize you’re worth something. Really, it all went fairly decently and everyone involved was very pleasant about it. Employers want to be eased out of a situation like that because nobody likes it.

Surviving the actual sacking and getting what you think is fair... is one crisis over, but next comes the longer process of recovery.

The next six weeks were awful. You feel angry, shocked, depressed and miserable and you doubt yourself; it’s very upsetting being rejected. And I missed the place; you’ve lost something and you have to mourn. It takes time and you need to be easy on yourself and go at your own pace. At first I couldn’t look people in the eye. I was ashamed. But when I started telling others about what had happened. I found that lots of people had been in a similar position. That helped me cope. In my field of work these things usually happen because your face doesn’t fit, not because of incompetence.

After that I felt a sense of relief. It was summer and I was free. I had time to think out what I wanted to do next. And I told myself I was good. I had existed before and during the sacking and I was going to go on afterwards. So I thought of other ways of operating.

So, I did find another job of my interest and it was good for me. I got my confidence back. I hadn’t fallen off the edge of the world after all and I could keep plugging away. Also, I realized, I felt happier working in a big organization, so, after about a year, a well-paid job in a large firm was molding me positively.

After a half-hour-listening to this man, I felt embarrassed for what I'm thinking about...I thought the reversed otherwise.